mandragora

Wife of firm accountant (who also works part-time as a bookeeper at the firm): "I really want to see that new film, about the cowboys. What's it's name?"

Mandragora: "Do you mean Brokeback Mountain?"

Bookeeper: "That's the one. It's just my type of film."

Mandragora: "You do know it's about two men who fall in love? With explicit sex scenes."

Bookeeper (with happy smile): "Oh yes. Exactly."

Later, at dinner.

Firm accountant (who is big and ginger and Scottish and aged over 50): "Oh, the [senior partner - who isn't gay] is just pissed off because a Civil Partnership isn't available to him, and he doesn't want to get married, but he does want the tax savings."

Mandragora: "Well, he's got a point. I think that both Civil Partnerships and marriage should be available to everyone, regardless of sexual orientation, and then they could choose what kind of commitment they want to make."

Firm accountant: "I agree. I can't see why gays shouldn't be allowed to marry, and I think we'll get there, but it'll take a while yet. Maybe 40 years." Pause. "of course, if we had less immigrants we'd probably get there quicker, bearing in mind their social attitudes."

Mandragora: "Yes, we have got quite a few immigrants coming in." Glances round table, to where senior partner's, er, partner, who he's been living with for about 15 years, is sitting. Next to her is the woman who drafts the firm's (smaller) bills. "I mean, we've got one Frenchwoman and one German woman right there. Oh and there's [fellow lawyer], from Australia."

Firm accountant: Splutters incoherently.

Mandragora: Laughs evilly.