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mandragoraI've been thinking of passports recently. Not exactly a fascinating topic, you might think but having had mine stolen last year and having to go through the rigmarole of getting a new one they've begun to interest me.
The fact that I need one at all, for example.
During the 'glory days' of the British Empire, British citizens did not carry passports. All they needed to do was announce that they were a British citizen at border crossings and were allowed through just because they were British, thus neatly avoiding the queue at the border that all other nationalities had to suffer when presenting their passports. This halcyon period (from a British traveller's perspective)lasted from the end of the Napoleonic Wars in 1815 to the beginning of the First World War in 1914. Alas, then the mighty fell and passports were introduced for the Brits - a telling example of waning British power.
But gosh, the fact that the British were the only nationality who didn't have to carry a passport also shows how much power they had. No wonder t'(really) old folk feel the loss so keenly, whereas it really doesn't rankle so much with someone like me, a child of the nadir of British industrial might, remembering the 3 day week and power cuts of the 1970s all too vividly. Will another empire arise during my lifetime with as much power as the British had? Doubtful. The only remaining superpower, the US, really doesn't go in for empires, which are definitely not in accordance with its
'land of the free and home of the brave' roots. Some people argue that
America has an empire already, of course, but if so it's a more subtle one
than that of the British, being an empire without official title and –
possibly – not as much overall power.
Nowadays, you're not meant to need a passport to travel within the EU. Which
works for pretty much all other European nationalities except the British. A
little matter of us not signing up to the Schengen Treaty. So, although
we're meant to be able to get by with some form of ID such as a drivers licence, in practice you'd better carry that passport.
Although, you can get by without it if absolutely necessary. I used to
organise a skiing trip for a group of friends each year. One time I had a
party of 25 who went skiing in France, at La Plagne. On the last day we had
to vacate our hotel rooms in the morning but as we weren't due to leave the
resort until the evening stashed our luggage in a room set aside by the
hotel and carried on skiing. Trouble was, we weren't the only group who were
doing this that day. There was also a group of Israelis which was roughly
the same size as ours. They had also put their luggage in the same room, but
placed in a different pile, behind a sign.
So, I told all my group where to put their luggage, emphasising that it
should definitely not go anywhere near the Israelis. Well of course
they didn't all listen, did they? A couple of the men (typical!) didn't,
anyway. One of them realised his mistake in time and caught the coach the
Israelis were departing the resort on and retrieved his luggage. The
other... didn't. He had nothing except the clothes he was wearing and his
ski-boots (he didn't even have a pair of shoes, had to go out and buy some
on his credit card that was, luckily, in his ski-jacket pocket). So, his
baggage, and passport were on their way to Tel Aviv, and he was on his way
back to England.
We were travelling by snow train and Eurostar. Getting to Paris was no
problem, of course, however before boarding Eurostar to travel through the
Chunnel you have to present your passport. As we approached Paris he got
more and more quiet and nervous. The rest of us were all being very
supportive of course, saying that it would 'probably only have to stay in
France for a few weeks while they get the new passport to you'. And that we
didn't think the French authorities would arrest him for not having
proper documentation to be in the country. And that the British Embassy
would be open for issuing visas on Monday, so he'd only have to wait until
then. Well, once he proved to them who he was etc.
Poor bloke.
So, we came to passport control at the Gard du Nord rail station at Paris
and we all sailed through. Except for him. He explained the situation in
pidgin French (we had at least 4 fluent French speakers in the party but it
was too much fun watching him trying to explain himself to interfere). Then
he tried producing a drivers licence as proof of ID. No joy, as it didn't
have a photo on it. So, he tried a gym membership card, which did. Still
'non'. Then he played his trump card and produced a Sainsbury's Reward Card.
This is a customer loyalty card issued by the Sainsbury's supermarket chain,
which is national in Britain, but (we thought) not known outside the UK.
Apparently, we were wrong, as that was the clincher, the French immigration
authorities thought that he must be British and waived him through.
Cue much joking on Eurostar on the way back to Waterloo Station (note that
the station chosen for Eurostar to come into is named after a famous French
defeat ::wry smile::) that we ought to set up a sideline, selling
Sainsbury's Reward Cards in eastern Europe to all those people wanting to
immigrate into the EU.
Yes, I know I've told the above story before, but it's good dammit
The fact that I need one at all, for example.
During the 'glory days' of the British Empire, British citizens did not carry passports. All they needed to do was announce that they were a British citizen at border crossings and were allowed through just because they were British, thus neatly avoiding the queue at the border that all other nationalities had to suffer when presenting their passports. This halcyon period (from a British traveller's perspective)lasted from the end of the Napoleonic Wars in 1815 to the beginning of the First World War in 1914. Alas, then the mighty fell and passports were introduced for the Brits - a telling example of waning British power.
But gosh, the fact that the British were the only nationality who didn't have to carry a passport also shows how much power they had. No wonder t'(really) old folk feel the loss so keenly, whereas it really doesn't rankle so much with someone like me, a child of the nadir of British industrial might, remembering the 3 day week and power cuts of the 1970s all too vividly. Will another empire arise during my lifetime with as much power as the British had? Doubtful. The only remaining superpower, the US, really doesn't go in for empires, which are definitely not in accordance with its
'land of the free and home of the brave' roots. Some people argue that
America has an empire already, of course, but if so it's a more subtle one
than that of the British, being an empire without official title and –
possibly – not as much overall power.
Nowadays, you're not meant to need a passport to travel within the EU. Which
works for pretty much all other European nationalities except the British. A
little matter of us not signing up to the Schengen Treaty. So, although
we're meant to be able to get by with some form of ID such as a drivers licence, in practice you'd better carry that passport.
Although, you can get by without it if absolutely necessary. I used to
organise a skiing trip for a group of friends each year. One time I had a
party of 25 who went skiing in France, at La Plagne. On the last day we had
to vacate our hotel rooms in the morning but as we weren't due to leave the
resort until the evening stashed our luggage in a room set aside by the
hotel and carried on skiing. Trouble was, we weren't the only group who were
doing this that day. There was also a group of Israelis which was roughly
the same size as ours. They had also put their luggage in the same room, but
placed in a different pile, behind a sign.
So, I told all my group where to put their luggage, emphasising that it
should definitely not go anywhere near the Israelis. Well of course
they didn't all listen, did they? A couple of the men (typical!) didn't,
anyway. One of them realised his mistake in time and caught the coach the
Israelis were departing the resort on and retrieved his luggage. The
other... didn't. He had nothing except the clothes he was wearing and his
ski-boots (he didn't even have a pair of shoes, had to go out and buy some
on his credit card that was, luckily, in his ski-jacket pocket). So, his
baggage, and passport were on their way to Tel Aviv, and he was on his way
back to England.
We were travelling by snow train and Eurostar. Getting to Paris was no
problem, of course, however before boarding Eurostar to travel through the
Chunnel you have to present your passport. As we approached Paris he got
more and more quiet and nervous. The rest of us were all being very
supportive of course, saying that it would 'probably only have to stay in
France for a few weeks while they get the new passport to you'. And that we
didn't think the French authorities would arrest him for not having
proper documentation to be in the country. And that the British Embassy
would be open for issuing visas on Monday, so he'd only have to wait until
then. Well, once he proved to them who he was etc.
Poor bloke.
So, we came to passport control at the Gard du Nord rail station at Paris
and we all sailed through. Except for him. He explained the situation in
pidgin French (we had at least 4 fluent French speakers in the party but it
was too much fun watching him trying to explain himself to interfere). Then
he tried producing a drivers licence as proof of ID. No joy, as it didn't
have a photo on it. So, he tried a gym membership card, which did. Still
'non'. Then he played his trump card and produced a Sainsbury's Reward Card.
This is a customer loyalty card issued by the Sainsbury's supermarket chain,
which is national in Britain, but (we thought) not known outside the UK.
Apparently, we were wrong, as that was the clincher, the French immigration
authorities thought that he must be British and waived him through.
Cue much joking on Eurostar on the way back to Waterloo Station (note that
the station chosen for Eurostar to come into is named after a famous French
defeat ::wry smile::) that we ought to set up a sideline, selling
Sainsbury's Reward Cards in eastern Europe to all those people wanting to
immigrate into the EU.
Yes, I know I've told the above story before, but it's good dammit
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no subject
Date: 31 January 2003 06:01 (UTC)That's hysterical. That is now my favorite passport story ever.
no subject
Date: 31 January 2003 06:30 (UTC)It is, isn't it? And actually what's also funny is that the reason why the bloke in question didn't realise that his luggage wasn't with the rest of ours was because he was too busy laughing at the other chap whose luggage had been taken away with that of the Israelis. You know that moment of comic realisation in the movies, when the awful truth crosses some poor person's face? Well his was exactly like that. ::g::
It must be said that the rest of us were vastly amused at the whole thing, and the Sainsbury's Reward Card was the crowning touch to an already comic incident. You usually have a lot of laughs on your standard skiing holiday, but this was the best